On our own

Back home, we left our dear dear nanny with my sister who has a baby. She has been with us for almost 5 years. We wanted so much to take her along but due to the limitation of my husband's status, we are unable to declare her as a dependent. Although we can sponsor her, we do not have the capacity yet to pay for her visa which I heard from my husband, costs about 10,000 riyals or depending on the exchange rate , is translated to more than 100,000 pesos. Hopefully, in the not so distant future we may be able to bring her over but probably no longer to work for us but to work on her own. Hopefully we can send her to school so that she can finish the degree that she has already started.


Prior to leaving the Philippines, I talked to my children about the life that we will be facing in this country. I set their expectations and was firm in saying that we have to work hand in hand. And that we have to do everything including domestic chores as a family. I assigned my daughter to washing the dishes and cooking rice, while my two sons are assigned to cleaning the table and mopping the floor. Just today, I decided to take it a notch higher. I am teaching my daughter now to wash our clothes, which should not be too hard as we have a washing machine. My eldest son, on the other hand, will help in hanging the clothes outside. While I do the ironing. My daughter, I have noticed is not too particular in doing things the way I wanted it done. She has her own style which would leave out a few things forgotten but I believe easy does it... we are slowly getting there. There are still a few hits and misses, but I know in time she would be more diligent in doing her assigned chores.

Two Saturdays ago before we left, my tita and cousins treated us to an eat-all-you can resto at Glorietta 5. It was there that my tita mentioned how my mom was so worried about my ability to handle the pressure of taking care of my kids coupled with domestic chores and work should I be able to find a job soon. She feels that my having a nanny since my daughter was 2 years old, may have altered my ability to survive. It's all but natural for mothers to feel that way, I think. Mothers are born worriers and like my own mom I worry as much too. But I know I can manage. I love the domestic life... I love cooking for my family! Hell! I even love doing the laundries (as long as there is a washing machine), and ironing clothes. It's not only the feeling of wanting to do those things but I find fulfillment in actually doing those stuff for my family. But because I want my children to grow up armed with the same life lessons, I delegate certain tasks to them. Hopefully, by the time that we go back to the Philippines, my children would already know by heart the value of discipline and hard work.